Sunday 2 August 2009

Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not

I really, really don't get you sometimes. It's annoying because really all I want is a bit of peace and not to feel so tightly wound around you. I can't speak for anyone else, but you make me uncomfortable. I'm not entirely sure how you see yourself. When you do things, do you see yourself in a film or a book? Sometimes I think it's kind of like fiction to you. All these things, romantic or otherwise, they aren't real life. They are these twisted things you've read about or watched that you think life should be like. Life isn't a fairytale.

I don't mean to be cruel and burst your bubble, if I did I would be more harsh. I just find it difficult to wrap my head around that someone can live their life thinking that these things are right. It's okay to like something or someone, it's another thing to let them consume you and become you're whole life. When I think of you I see a jigsaw of all these things that you think define you. I don't see one solid person but ideas cobbled together by other people. Sort of like a Frankenstein of fiction. All this stuff that means nothing. Emptiness.

What I really want is for you to find yourself. It's like being around a character in a book or a film then being around a real person. Optimism isn't bad. Delusion is. Maybe this is just me. It's just how I feel. Attaching different things to yourself doesn't make you a person, developing your own persona makes you a person. Right now you're just a parody of what you could be - in my eyes anyway.